USAF MOM!!!

So our son Matt left this past Monday for USAF Basic Military Training (BMT).  Scott and I took Monday off to spend with Matt in his last few hours as a civilian.  Dropping our baby boy off at that recruiter station was the hardest thing I've ever done as a parent.  And I thought leaving him at college was hard!  With college I at least got to see his dorm, meet his roomate, and approve of his surroundings.  At least he was able to come home on the weekends whenever he liked.  And the good thing was, while in college, he was only an hour's drive away if an emergency ever arose, a comforting thought for any Mother's heart!

But now, just like that, he's gone.  College was different.  He was on his own but yet he wasn't.  He still relied on us for a lot of things - money being first and foremost!  Yes, the nest seemed empty when he went off to college, but now, he's gone.  This time his leaving has much more permanence and seemed to happen so abruptly.  I knew my son would leave the nest, but I thought it would be a more gradual process than this.  I imagined him finishing college, moving back home and starting a career, saving up money to finally move out on his own.  I thought I had MORE TIME with him!  But I was wrong.  Our son did grow up in an instant and now he is doing what we hoped to raise him to do - to find himself, be a productive member of society, and do what he loves doing in life!

Things will never return to the way they were.  Our family will never be exactly the same again.  His returns home will take on new meaning...no longer where he lives but where he lived...not where he stays but where he visits.  This has such weird connotation to me!  We've always been such a close knit family so to have one of my babies moving out and completely on their own is a struggle for my heart!

This week I've struggled with so many emotions.  I'm really missing my right hand man!  He's been such a great son and big brother.  He has always been there to help around the house, with the yardwork, and with his siblings - expecially the 6 months out of the year where I'm a cross country coach's widow!

We are so proud of Mathew's choice to serve our country.  We are so proud that he was one of the FEW who made it through the stringent criteria to be accepted as a recruit...and believe me,  quite a few who went with him to MEPS this past summer were rejected.  We are so very happy for him because he is happy and has found his calling in life.  We know that BMT will be the biggest challenge of his life and we are praying for God to supply him with strength, courage, and wisdom in facing this challenge.  Yet, I still wonder what happened to the little cottonheaded boy who stole my heart.  What happened to that sweet baby boy whose big blue eyes stared so intently into mine the night he was born, as though to say, "Are you my Mommy?"  Yes, it was love at first sight when our eyes locked onto one another!  Now our little 'Strong Man' has truly become a strong man!  And that does a mother's heart good!

I'm a PROUD, yes, PROUD to be a USAF MOM!!! 

BTW... 

Matt called for the first time this morning from BMT. He sounded so officially military like when he recited the script they gave him to read providing his mailing address out there...but before he had to hang up, he quietly said with the most tender voice, "I love you, Mom!" He then quickly snapped back into his matter of fact tone and in a deep manly voice barked out, "Bye!" He sounded happy. He is doing okay. He is doing what he chose to do and I know will love.  That's all I need to know...my heart is relieved - for now!!!!

In His Love, Cathy