When We Stumble: Forgiving Yourself

"Some of the wise will stumble, so that they may be refined, purified and made spotless until the time of the end, for it will still come at the appointed time."  Daniel 11:35 (NIV)

I often wonder why I seem to stumble so much. I wonder why, how no matter how hard I try to be faithful or do the right thing, I seem to fail and fall flat on my face.  Though I know I am not perfect and that I struggle in the flesh like every other believer on the earth, I tend to beat myself up for stumbling so often.  I wonder why this life is such a struggle for me while others seem to glide effortlessly through it - seeming to never fall or even stub a toe.  Then I read Daniel 11:35.  It spoke truth in my heart on the matter.  You see, sometimes we stumble not because of sin, but because God is refining us, purifying us, strengthening us so that, in the end, our impurities are pressed out of us.  Our stumbling is for our own edification and growth - spiritually refining us into the men and women God desires us to be.

And when my stumbling is due to my own sin and shortcomings, I know that I can seek God's forgiveness.  Yet, I have a difficult time forgiving myself. I'm so very hard on myself.  But this is counterproductive to God's work in me and can lead to a state of spiritual paralysis.  Instead, I need to cut myself some slack - trust that God has truly forgiven, forgive myself, and understand that He is refining me in the process.   

God forgives - and FORGETS.  He wipes the slate clean.  That is His promise to those who repent and seek His forgiveness.  Jesus took care of it...so if He - who bled and died for our sins - can forgive me, shouldn't I learn to forgive myself as well? 

Jeremiah 31:34b, “I will forgive their iniquity, and I will remember their sin no more.” (ESV)

In His Love, Cathy